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"The world is changed. I feel it in the water. I feel it in the earth. I smell it in the air." A famous line from the beginning of the movie "Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring" keeps spinning in my head on the night of March 15, 2020, a few hours after former President Rodrigo R. Duterte placed the entire Metro Manila under lockdown and the rest of the regions followed. I might have misattributed the line, but for me, the meaning is fear and uncertainty.
There were so many things on my mind at the height of the COVID-19 pandemic. What will be the future of this nation? Is this the punishment for the sins that we have committed? And how are we going to get through this, or is this the beginning of the end? During those times, it was easier to embrace despair than to think that the situation would change and that we were all going to make it. Well, the latter became more doubtful when, a few months after the extension of quarantine, a friend of mine from college was infected by the virus and died a week later. The shocking news didn’t end there; a colleague from the previous company had suffered the same fate. Left and right, news from family, friends, and people around me told me stories of the same sadness and horror.
The number of deaths was only one of the problems brought about by the pandemic. Jobs, food, the economy, education, and many other things were affected. I was consumed by fear for the safety and well-being of my beloved wife, precious son, and cherished family. It seemed as though an overwhelming sense of trepidation had gripped us all during those trying times. However, as the days unfolded, a glimmer of hope began to emerge. The progress was gradual, but there was an undeniable optimism that things would keep improving, eventually placing us in the position we had fervently hoped for. The vaccines have arrived, the rate of getting infected has slowed down, and recoveries have increased. Thanks to the tireless efforts of the government and the dedication of our brave frontline workers, we find ourselves fast forwarding to the present day, where it appears that the end of the pandemic is finally reaching its conclusion.
When the government lifted the quarantine in late 2022, it was really a sigh of relief for everyone. For me, I was thankful to God that I belonged to those who survived the onslaught of COVID-19. Reflecting on what we have experienced as a nation and as a Filipino, I can’t help but ask myself: How did we manage to make it? Again, as mentioned, the frontliners and the government's efforts were a huge part of going through the challenge that we have faced. But there is something that only pure-blooded Filipinos can understand, and that is that in times of difficulties, trials, and uncertainties, we Filipinos have this "BAHALA NA" weapon in our arsenal. It sounds like nonsense, but it is the most likely reason why we wake up every day, no matter what situation we are in.
In the late 80s and 90s, my family and I were living in a slum area, and I always heard the words from my mother when we did not have something to eat. "Bahala na!" then she will go out and find ways to bring food to our table. In the past three years, I have heard the same phrase from people around me.
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Though uncertainty surrounds me and the outcome remains unknown, I choose to embrace an unwavering faith in the belief that I will persevere through God’s grace. Despite my fears and vulnerabilities, I am compelled to face the challenges ahead. The path that lies before me is fraught with risks and uncertainties, yet I am determined to summon the strength and courage necessary to navigate it. "Bahala na! May awa ang Dios (God is merciful)"; "bahala na!" This is for my family and loved ones.
To those who will read this story, "bahala na" if you’re going to like it or not. 🙂
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